A Letter of Apology

1 Corinthians 13:4-7

 Love is patient and kind. Love is not jealous or boastful or proud or rude. It does not demand its own way. It is not irritable, and it keeps no record of being wronged. It does not rejoice about injustice but rejoices whenever the truth wins out. Love never gives up, never loses faith, is always hopeful, and endures through every circumstance.

 

To the communities we, the church, have failed, we are sorry.

To those suffering from addictions, we are sorry we haven’t been patient with you, and have tried to press our timelines and our expectations onto you. We recognise that fighting addiction is hard. Remain strong, and in your time, you’ll get through this.

To the LGBTIQ community, we are sorry for our lack of kindness, our ‘words of truth’ in the name of “love”. We were wrong. When we say things that are hurtful; that tear you down, and strip you of your dignity, that wasn’t love. No matter what we think.

To our families, friends, and colleagues, we are sorry for acting out of our envy of who you are, what you have, and the way you do life. We recognise that we need to learn to be thankful for what we have, and not bring you down in our immaturity.

To single parents, we are sorry for imposing our “family values,” for boasting that we have it all worked out, and failing to see your hurt, your strength, your resilience, and your fighting spirit.

To those of other faiths, we are sorry for our false certainties, ignorance, arrogance and pride.

To those who are (or are in the process of being) divorced or separated, we are sorry that we have been rude, made horribly insensitive comments, and haven’t supported you when you need it most.

To our indigenous communities, we are sorry that we have demanded our way for far too long, and for our blindness. We are sorry that we have been quick to talk and slow to listen, when we’ve listened at all..

To those who have no faith, we are sorry for our narrow-mindedness, and lack of genuine dialogue, and our irritability when we don’t get the responses that we want..

To those who have made poor choices, we are sorry that we have held this over you, judged you for it, and not given you space to discover a new you in a safe space.

To those seeking asylum, we are sorry that we have not fought harder for justice for you, and in some instances, even rejoiced in injustices towards you. You deserve a safe and secure place in our communities.

To those suffering from homelessness, we are sorry for when we have given up on you; for a system that disempowers you, and our ability to effectively advocate for change. Every person should have a safe and stable place to call home.

To our young people, we are sorry for when we’ve lost faith in you; in who you are, and what you’re capable of. Sorry for when we have decided that you’re too much work, or making too many poor choices. You are our future leaders. You are of intrinsic value. We must learn to back you.

To those who have been the target of racism within our churches, we are sorry for our small minds and smaller hearts. Sorry for when we have lost hope that things can change, and seeing you as anything less than God’s good creation, with value and worth.

And to our church communities, we are sorry for not being there when you are hurting, and have too often neglected you, pushed you aside, or not seen your pain; for not enduring with you.

To each of the communities identified, and to the others we fail to see or love, we must vow to do better.

With love,

A very sorry Christian.